One of the most personal relationships a woman can have in her lifetime is with her hairdresser. For females, hair can be a sign of many things, femininity, sexuality, power, and temperament. For something that is so seemingly trivial, it has a huge impact on how others perceive us, and how we shape our own self-image. Because of this, a relationship with your hairdresser can become much more than a mere acquaintance. Not only do you trust them with your outer persona. You are putting your self-worth in their hands, because, as many of us know, a bad haircut can destroy your confidence.
I have had my hairdresser for nearly 15 years, since we moved to the sticks when I was 6. Jo has watched me grow up; she cuts my mother’s hair, my grandmother’s hair and occasionally my brother’s hair. She’s watched the ups and downs our family have experienced, she sees the intricacies of our daily living and most importantly, she knows what works and what doesn’t with my tangled nest of hair. I have been committed to her for nearly 15 years… but now, I’m starting to stray.
The cracks started to appear last year. University opened my eyes and emptied my bank account; I had neither the time nor the funds to go to see her. But all was forgiven. When I came back for the summer, I needed a change, I was getting restless, I was itching to explore. That’s when I very sneakily made my first appointment with Bonnie. I purposely picked a day Jo wouldn’t be in so I didn’t have to be confronted by those hurt, questioning eyes. And it worked; Bonnie was just the change I needed. I felt revitalised and energetic –but I was consumed with guilt. An internal conflict raged within me, stronger than any storm mighty Poseidon could conjure. I felt like I had betrayed a best friend.
Today I had another appointment with Bonnie. I thought I had covered my tracks, I thought Jo wouldn’t be there until later –but my appointment ran late and she arrived early.
I was caught red-handed with another hairdresser.
I desperately tried to make myself invisible; I averted my eyes, kept my head low, but she saw me and I felt terrible.
For many women making the transition between hairdressers, especially after an extended period of time, really does feel like cheating on a friend. But, like staling friendships, sticking with a hairdresser who can no longer represent the true you is a lost cause. The best thing you can do for every party involved is to be upfront from the start, your hairdresser and your tresses will be thankful in the long run.
